today i’m going to…

this is one version of my horoscope for today, from astrocenter.com:

Your Horoscope for AUGUST 06, 2007
Ahhh…you would like to get away from it all, wouldn’t you, Gail? Appealing as the idea of escape is, it is only by staying put that you will be able to resolve the personal entanglements you’ve gotten yourself into. If you think that moving to another country or to a different planet will put things right, you are dead wrong. You cannot escape who you are. What you have to change is not your location, but your attitude!

i sent this to a friend, with whom i had been discussing my desire to relocate and she sent me the following horoscope in response, asking me to decide which one fits:

PISCES(Feb 20 – Mar 20)Do you feel hemmed in? Are you aware of restrictions and
limitations? Areyou forever running out of time, money, energy or enthusiasm? That’s understandable but you should not consider any of this to be indicative of future circumstance. Think of a way in which the elastic, on a catapult, gets stretched a long way back before it goes flying forward. Any moment now, you are going to start hurtling towards success. Your progress will be a direct result of the process you are bravely going through now.

the thing is, i don’t see why it has to be either/or. they both fit. i may feel hemmed in, but ‘running away’ right now is not going to help that situation. ultimately i feel as though i need to stay here in kc for the time being and deal with some things, make some realistic solid plans, and go from there. running to albany or providence or philly or wherever just because i feel like leaving is just as much taking the easy way out as it would be to plan on staying here the rest of my life.

i’ve really been thinking about this a lot over the past 12 hours or so. of course i know i am liable to change my mind tomorrow or at any given point in time, but it makes the most sense for me to stay in kc for a couple of years, while i finish library school and actually *save money* (shudder!). the library will help me pay for school, plus with what i make per month, i should be able to save a substantial amount of money and still maintain my current standard (ha!) of living, even if i move to a larger place where the rent is slightly more (or if my friend would move to kc and we could be roommates…). my rationale is, i don’t want to move just to say i want to live in a different, more interesting place. the fact is that i do think bad things are coming down the pike for this country and the world, and it would be foolish to live in a city of substantial size (any city). plus, i really want a straw bale home, or a home built out of mostly natural materials, off the grid. by saving money as i finish library school, i can move somewhere of my choosing, after the proper research. the best place would be somewhere that i’d be able to buy a small plot of affordable land outside a college town (and preferably close to some water), so i can build this little cottage and be able to work in a library while doing my thing otherwise and when bad stuff starts to happen i (and anyone who happens to be living with me) will be self-sufficient. so this is what i’m thinking today. and i can do all the other stuff i’m interested in in the meantime, like writing and reading and reiki and soap making and learning to garden and spiritual interests, and life will be interesting, as always. plus, i will still be moving toward success as stated in the second horoscope, which in my mind is defined as knowing god through knowing myself and other people in my life.

sounds like a plan to me. 🙂

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